Once

the first time
my mother held me in her arms
i felt i had entered
a cathedral
i felt what i had not felt before
a closeness so great
i felt i had entered her
as i was held not only in her arms
but in her heart

this was so strange
and so i pulled away (fearing for my autonomy)
out from under the vaulting
only thinking about it now
it seemed a place noone goes anymore
and there was a small bright little warm thing
in the great dark cold emptiness

i cannot again find that door (because there is no door)
though ive walked around outside that church
that place is where i need to be
and there to light a fire, sweep and polish
to admit that love, appreciation, admiration
to nurture her, and me

 

20161027

dVerse challenge: Firsts

 

 

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4 thoughts on “Once

  1. This has so many layers, and I can feel the longing woven throughout the words. I love this: “and there was a small bright little warm thing
    in the great dark cold emptiness”
    Really lovely.

    Like

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